Knowing that You Have Extended Forgiveness

Tonight, I received a call from a man who called me pastor for almost a year. This man has been a blog topic before and a major source of encouragement.

In the conversation, he mentioned a man in the church who despised me. This man would post derogatory remarks about me and the church on Facebook. Whenever he called me, he never called me “pastor” or by my real name. He always called me “young man”. His negativity drove me crazy then, but I know that he is that way. It is nothing personal.

My friend told me that this man is undergoing cancer treatments. No ill feelings arose. It saddened me to hear this news. I even prayed for his healing tonight. The past is over, and this man needs a touch from God.

You know you have forgiven someone when the name comes up in conversation and you don’t need to walk out of the room or zone out. When you wish that person the best despite what has been done, you have been set free.

If you are reading this and struggling with forgiveness, I do not condemn you. I ask that God will bring healing into your life so you can be set free to love the one who wronged you. Oh the joy you will have!

6 thoughts on “Knowing that You Have Extended Forgiveness

  1. I truly know this on a personal level! One of the most hurtful things to ever happen to me was in a church that I loved dearly. I loved the leaders dearly, the women was one of my closest friends and an amazing mentor. However sometimes things go wrong and in our case we were falsely accused by this dear couple and quite literally kicked out of the church we helped plant. I was devastated and struggled to even speak about this couple for a long time. A year ago I heard this man had stepped down from pastoring the church and some people around me who knew my story smiled as if this would make me happy. I finally knew that I had forgiven them as I didn’t feel happy at all, I felt sorrow and sick to my stomach. It reminds me of the Psalms when David talks about his enemies gloating over his trials, yet when they were sick he wept for them. God calls us to mourn with those who mourn…whether or not they’ve shown us the same mercy!

  2. Brother Matthew, may I add – we know we’ve forgiven when it doesn’t “hurt” anymore… or it hurts “less”. 😎😎😎

  3. My former husband now has cancer. When he was diagnosed, I reached out in kindness and we reconnected, but disconnected a few weeks later when he chose lying over truth even when I had the facts. I forgave him long ago. There will always be a tiny piece that remembers the love we once shared, but now I feel nothing for him. I keep his health in my prayers (for my kids’ sakes) but otherwise, he’s no more than a stranger.

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